You can probably put the pieces together on this one, friends, but it helps to stick together during tragedies like this: Madonna is making her very own calendar for 2015, and it looks absolutely pathetic. Not that she's making a calendar, really -- tons of people love Madonna, and tons of people loving having calendars based on things they love -- but just the picture. The cover she chose of her sucking on a bottle. Doesn't it make your heart fill with sadness?
Just ... just let it go, Madonna. It's OK. You don't have to stimulate oral sex to be popular. It's all right, really. You can just let all this go. I think we'd all be better for it. You don't have to completely change yourself, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do, but the oral sex thing, for real. That can stop.
